I can't tell you how many times I've rolled my eyes at cheesy pick-up lines. Sorry guys, they don't really work. A "good" i.e. creative pick-up line may be a good way to "break the ice" but those are rare. Women want sincerity. Feeding us lines will only get you so far. After that we become bored and start looking for something with substance. If you see a girl that you really want to talk to, take a step back and observe. You're in the same place so you must have at least one thing in common. Capitalize on that and start talking to her about it. After you've initiated conversation, take it and run with it.
We want to know that you find us interesting, not that you're looking for your next hook-up. Most women like to connect on an intellectual level as well as the physical. We want to be more than just a pretty face to you. At the same time we also want to know that you find us attractive. Its all about finding a good balance.
Being real with us is the key. Yes, we enjoy being flattered and complimented but words do very little for us if you're not behind them. A woman can tell if you're just feeding her a line or if you genuinely mean what you're saying. One of the biggest turn-offs is a guy who talks the talk but doesn't walk the walk.
Women want a man that is sincere and is real. The best thing you can do is be yourself. If you find yourself having to pretend to be something that you're not to impress a girl, she's not the girl for you. Who you are is going to be great for someone, you just have to find the right one. Being honest with yourself and with the girl you're dating is very important. You will get tired of having to act a certain way if its not what comes naturally to you and then you're faced with a bigger problem. You won't be the same guy the girl you're dating originally fell for.
It is very important to make sure that your words match your actions. We place more value on what you do and how you treat us than on what you say.
A Love I Never Thought I'd Get To Get To
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Thursday, June 7, 2007
You Want To Land That 2nd Date?
Okay, you've met a girl that you really like, you ask her out and she says yes, way to go! Now, in this situation you may not even be thinking about a second date because you're still completely stoked by the fact that you have the first date penciled into your day planner. Be careful. The easiest way to ensure you won't get a second date is if you botch the first date. Sometimes a first date is all you want after going out with a girl, but for the purpose of this blog we'll go on the premise that she's amazing and is everything you want in a woman. A first impression may be the only impression you have the opportunity to make. It will be the foundation of a person's opinions and feelings about you just as the first date will be the foundation of any potential relationship. You may only get one shot so make it count gentlemen.
The first date is crucial, so everything you do on the first date will be just as significant. The worst thing you can do on a first date is take her to do something that limits your ability to get to know each other. A movie can be a good date... on the third or fourth date. In order for us to want to go out with you again, we need the opportunity to get to know you. You can't talk in a movie theater. Dinner is always a good choice, unless of course she doesn't eat, in which case I'd highly recommend dating someone else. Dinner conversation can be an excellent way to learn about each other. You don't even have to take us out to an expensive restaurant. If you can cook, what better way to impress your date than to show off your culinary skills? A man that can cook is attractive; a man that cooks for us is even better. Cooking dinner together can be an award winning date. You really get to know someone when you're cooking in the kitchen together, and you have a lot of fun.
Doing your homework before your first date can be a sure fire way of guaranteeing a good time. If you can find out what some of her interests are you can plan a date that can't fail, unless there just isn't any chemistry between the two of you. (If this is the case I can't really help you, sorry!) If your date likes astronomy, take her stargazing. If you and your date have some of the same interests its a good idea to start there. That way you're both sure to enjoy the date. If you're both into sports take her to a baseball game or go play tennis or sand volleyball together. A thoughtful and creative first date will lead to a second date 99% of the time.
The worst thing you can do on a first date is to show up without a plan. Make sure that when you pick your date up you know exactly what you're going to be doing that evening. It looks really bad to sit in the drive way asking the girl to come up with the game plan for the night. An exception to this would be to come up with a couple different options for the evening and let her choose. Just make sure you've put thought into the date, she'll be able to tell.
The girl you're taking out is going to be paying attention to even the smallest detail of your date. It's going to make a difference if you open her doors for her or if you make her open them herself. Women are all very capable of opening our own doors but when a man opens our door for us it shows that he has a level of respect for us. Go to the door to get her, never, I repeat, never call her from your car and expect her to come out. If you don't respect her or care enough to get out of your car and go to the door, then you have no business taking her out. Open her car door when she gets in and if you're looking to really show the gentleman in you, open it when she gets out. Some girls won't wait for a guy to open the door so they can get out of the car so you need to either be very quick or you need to let her know that you expect the chance to be a gentleman. This applies to all doors. Some girls won't go out again with a guy that doesn't open doors for her. Remember, we want to be respected.
So, you've reached the end of your first date with this amazing girl and you're dieing to take her out again. Be careful. You can screw up a good thing at the very end. When you take your date home, don't pull up to the house and drop her off. Walk her to her door. Like I said, your date will be paying attention to every detail. We as women tend to file away every little thing about a date to our memory and spend hours mulling over it trying to figure out what each comment, gesture, and touch really meant.
If you take the time to plan a first date that is fun and creative and show her the respect she deserves, I can promise you that landing that second date shouldn't be a problem for you.
The first date is crucial, so everything you do on the first date will be just as significant. The worst thing you can do on a first date is take her to do something that limits your ability to get to know each other. A movie can be a good date... on the third or fourth date. In order for us to want to go out with you again, we need the opportunity to get to know you. You can't talk in a movie theater. Dinner is always a good choice, unless of course she doesn't eat, in which case I'd highly recommend dating someone else. Dinner conversation can be an excellent way to learn about each other. You don't even have to take us out to an expensive restaurant. If you can cook, what better way to impress your date than to show off your culinary skills? A man that can cook is attractive; a man that cooks for us is even better. Cooking dinner together can be an award winning date. You really get to know someone when you're cooking in the kitchen together, and you have a lot of fun.
Doing your homework before your first date can be a sure fire way of guaranteeing a good time. If you can find out what some of her interests are you can plan a date that can't fail, unless there just isn't any chemistry between the two of you. (If this is the case I can't really help you, sorry!) If your date likes astronomy, take her stargazing. If you and your date have some of the same interests its a good idea to start there. That way you're both sure to enjoy the date. If you're both into sports take her to a baseball game or go play tennis or sand volleyball together. A thoughtful and creative first date will lead to a second date 99% of the time.
The worst thing you can do on a first date is to show up without a plan. Make sure that when you pick your date up you know exactly what you're going to be doing that evening. It looks really bad to sit in the drive way asking the girl to come up with the game plan for the night. An exception to this would be to come up with a couple different options for the evening and let her choose. Just make sure you've put thought into the date, she'll be able to tell.
The girl you're taking out is going to be paying attention to even the smallest detail of your date. It's going to make a difference if you open her doors for her or if you make her open them herself. Women are all very capable of opening our own doors but when a man opens our door for us it shows that he has a level of respect for us. Go to the door to get her, never, I repeat, never call her from your car and expect her to come out. If you don't respect her or care enough to get out of your car and go to the door, then you have no business taking her out. Open her car door when she gets in and if you're looking to really show the gentleman in you, open it when she gets out. Some girls won't wait for a guy to open the door so they can get out of the car so you need to either be very quick or you need to let her know that you expect the chance to be a gentleman. This applies to all doors. Some girls won't go out again with a guy that doesn't open doors for her. Remember, we want to be respected.
So, you've reached the end of your first date with this amazing girl and you're dieing to take her out again. Be careful. You can screw up a good thing at the very end. When you take your date home, don't pull up to the house and drop her off. Walk her to her door. Like I said, your date will be paying attention to every detail. We as women tend to file away every little thing about a date to our memory and spend hours mulling over it trying to figure out what each comment, gesture, and touch really meant.
If you take the time to plan a first date that is fun and creative and show her the respect she deserves, I can promise you that landing that second date shouldn't be a problem for you.
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
The Female Rules
Lately I've been hearing that Women are complicated. Well, Gentlemen, I'm about to let you in on one of our best kept secrets. We aren't as complicated as you think. I know it's hard to believe, but please try to. Yes, I know that Women are one of life's great mysteries. Some Men will never understand us, but trust me, there is hope. Once you've learned the secret to Women, you'll know how to approach pretty much any situation.
There is a set of rules called The Female Rules that every Woman knows and expects the Man to follow. Unfortunatley, we never share them with the Man but expect him to follow them anyway. As a Woman, I shouldn't be sharing these with you, (it's against the rules) but I think everyone would benefit from men knowing The Femal Rules.
The Female Rules:
1. The Female always makes The Rules.
2. The Rules are subject to change without notice.
3. No Male can possibly know all The Rules.
4. If the Female suspects the Male knows all The Rules, she must immediately change some of The Rules.
5. The Female is never wrong.
6. If it appears the Female is wrong, it is becasue of a flagrant misunderstanding caused by something the Male did or said wrong.
7. If Rule #6 applies, the Male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding.
8. The Female can change her mind at any time.
9. The Male must never change his mind without the express written consent of the Female.
10. The Female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
11. The Male must remain calm at all times, unless the Female wants him to be angry or upset.
12. The Female must, under no circumstances, let the Male know whether she wants him to be angry or upset.
13. The Male is expected to read the Female's mind at all times.
14. At all times, what is important is what the Female meant, not what she said.
15. I If the Female has PMS, all The Rules are null and void and the Male must cater to her every whim.
16. If the Male, at any time, believes he is right, he must refer to Rule #6.
See, not complicated at all. =) Okay, all joking aside. Let's get serious.
Women haven't changed much through the years. We have become more out spoken and independent, and yes, we are capable of taking care of ourselves, but for the most part we still want the same things we've always wanted. As women, we want to be respected, loved, treated well, and appreciated. There was a time when men would fight to the death to defend a woman's honor and these days it's hard to find a guy that will even open our car door for us. We are all capable of opening our own doors (as those of you who don't open them for us have clearly seen) but something as simple as a guy opening our door shows that you have a level of respect for us. We take note of everything from the way you ask us out to the goodbye at the end of the date. Everything you say or do is filed away in our memory to be mulled over for hours as we try to figure what each comment, gesture, or touch really meant. As confusing as you may think we are, we find you just as confusing.
If you're interested in a girl, it's important to let her know you're interested. One of the things that frustrates us girls most is that guys don't ask girls out anymore. As much as we enjoy "hanging out" with you, we'd rather be dating. Another important thing to remember gentlemen, is that we want to be appreciated. Some guys complain that girls take too long to get ready. What they don't realize is that we take that much time because we want to look our best for you. That's right guys, you're the reason it takes a girl an hour to get ready to go out. Let us know that we're noticed and that you think we look nice.
There is a set of rules called The Female Rules that every Woman knows and expects the Man to follow. Unfortunatley, we never share them with the Man but expect him to follow them anyway. As a Woman, I shouldn't be sharing these with you, (it's against the rules) but I think everyone would benefit from men knowing The Femal Rules.
The Female Rules:
1. The Female always makes The Rules.
2. The Rules are subject to change without notice.
3. No Male can possibly know all The Rules.
4. If the Female suspects the Male knows all The Rules, she must immediately change some of The Rules.
5. The Female is never wrong.
6. If it appears the Female is wrong, it is becasue of a flagrant misunderstanding caused by something the Male did or said wrong.
7. If Rule #6 applies, the Male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding.
8. The Female can change her mind at any time.
9. The Male must never change his mind without the express written consent of the Female.
10. The Female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
11. The Male must remain calm at all times, unless the Female wants him to be angry or upset.
12. The Female must, under no circumstances, let the Male know whether she wants him to be angry or upset.
13. The Male is expected to read the Female's mind at all times.
14. At all times, what is important is what the Female meant, not what she said.
15. I If the Female has PMS, all The Rules are null and void and the Male must cater to her every whim.
16. If the Male, at any time, believes he is right, he must refer to Rule #6.
See, not complicated at all. =) Okay, all joking aside. Let's get serious.
Women haven't changed much through the years. We have become more out spoken and independent, and yes, we are capable of taking care of ourselves, but for the most part we still want the same things we've always wanted. As women, we want to be respected, loved, treated well, and appreciated. There was a time when men would fight to the death to defend a woman's honor and these days it's hard to find a guy that will even open our car door for us. We are all capable of opening our own doors (as those of you who don't open them for us have clearly seen) but something as simple as a guy opening our door shows that you have a level of respect for us. We take note of everything from the way you ask us out to the goodbye at the end of the date. Everything you say or do is filed away in our memory to be mulled over for hours as we try to figure what each comment, gesture, or touch really meant. As confusing as you may think we are, we find you just as confusing.
If you're interested in a girl, it's important to let her know you're interested. One of the things that frustrates us girls most is that guys don't ask girls out anymore. As much as we enjoy "hanging out" with you, we'd rather be dating. Another important thing to remember gentlemen, is that we want to be appreciated. Some guys complain that girls take too long to get ready. What they don't realize is that we take that much time because we want to look our best for you. That's right guys, you're the reason it takes a girl an hour to get ready to go out. Let us know that we're noticed and that you think we look nice.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)